Guest Contributor: Michelle Bengtson
In a recent discussion around the dinner table, my children were quick to point out that there are some things in this world that are naturally “better together.” Like eggs and bacon, Mickey and Minnie, peanut butter and jelly, and Batman and Robin.
I also firmly believe that we, as women who spend our days encouraging one another, are better together.
Since the beginning of time, God created us this way. In the Garden of Eden, God declared it was not good for man to be alone, and went on to fashion a help-mate for Adam, so that Adam and Eve would then be better. Together.
The Bible has quite a bit to say about this togetherness, particularly as it refers to “one another.”
1. The most well known admonition is that we love one another.
A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love one another. By this all men will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another.
John 13:34-35
2. In our interactions with each other, we are better together when we build each other up.
Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
1 Thessalonians 5:11
3. It’s also imperative we foster an environment where it is safe for others to have the freedom to be transparent and share not only their needs but also their mistakes, while at the same time, we must be willing to vulnerably confess our human frailties and mistakes to others. And for others to be willing to share their difficulties, their trials, their mistakes, we must offer a safe environment filled with kindness, compassion, and forgiveness.
Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Ephesians 4:32
4. Accountability between each other is yet one more thing that makes us better together.
Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.
James 5:16
God designed us to not only be better together, but to desire togetherness. Yet since the beginning of time, the enemy of our soul has been working to separate and isolate us both from each other and from God. In psychology, we know that isolation is both a contributor and a symptom of depression but togetherness can lend help, strength, and wholeness.
Being transparent first and foremost necessitates honesty. Sometimes being transparent is trivial but sometimes there are things we aren’t aware of about ourselves that come to light through sharing of ourselves with others. The real work of transparency is to humbly accept the input of other believers in areas maybe we aren’t even aware of.
In order to grow emotionally and spiritually in our relationship with God and others, we may also be required to open up about things we might feel ashamed of. So often, it is shame over things we have done or said that keep us quiet and afraid to share transparently with others. But those shameful secrets only hold their power as long as they are kept in the dark.
We can choose to allow that shame to force us to go it alone. Sometimes it feels faster or easier that way. But if we want to grow deeper and go further, we’ll take the time to bring these secrets into the light in a safe, loving relationship with other believers, and as we love one another, show compassion to one another, and forgive one another, many will be set free.
Deeper Still: In what ways are you more effective with the support of someone else?
Author, speaker and board certified clinical neuropsychologist, Dr. Michelle Bengtson is also a wife, mother and friend. She knows pain and despair first hand and combines her professional expertise and personal experience with her faith to address issues surrounding medical and mental disorders, both for those who suffer and for those who care for them. She offers sound practical tools, affirms worth, and encourages faith. Dr. Bengtson is the author of “Hope Prevails: Insights From a Doctor’s Personal Journey Through Depression.”
